I have blogged about this before but seriously, in so many ways, I hate what I've become. In other ways, I love how I've changed for the better too. *Sigh* I'm not trying to be negative, but I guess I just want to analyse things about me critically so I can see where I've went wrong, and where I've went right.
A part of what has sparked these thoughts right now was watching the United DVD that came with the CD. Man I loved it; it was so encouraging. It's so weird hearing the core group talk about how their lives changed through a summer camp and how 1998 was the year that sparked it all because that exact date and event was what sparked my desire to serve the Lord with my life as well. Wow...I became something different after that camp. I was so into witnessing and bringing my friends to Christ and Jesus WAS my identity.
Through the years though, things have changed. I noticed that the world has become a lot more complicated; I've become more about other things than just having Christ identity-wise. Over time, career, ministries, school, relationships, etc. have complicated things. Honestly, I want what I once had....I want to be about Christ....it'll annoy some people I know it haha. I just want to reflect Christ more in my life. I fee like I want to be a better witness through my life and through how I treat others. I know I'm drifted pretty far....I wonder if my friends from school can see Christ through me? It's a sad thought......
So why am I even talking about this? To me, how I live my life affects the youth I work with. Man, how can I expect them the youth to be sold out for something when there aren't any traces of it in my life? I don't want this to be a wasted theme...I don't want the youth to only see an average sold out leader for Christ as an example of what being sold out is all about. Man, I want to see these youth souled out! God I know it's not about me...but I know I can at least be an example for these youth....Holy Spirit would you begin stirring that again in me? Would you help me be an example to these youth? Would you bring these youth to the place where nothing matters in life except your approval? Let the chase begin......
6 comments:
Good post.
I say go all the way.
Hey I'm not saying that those things are bad...but they all have a place and they should never take the first priority over things....it's too easy to say, "I'll make time for God when things settle down"...especially since things get busier in life, just got to make priorities early in life.....if God is important now, He'll be important later....yeah the funny thing is, I'm not busy right now...haha...school's done for me and has been for almost 2 weeks now....it's more than just a down period for me...it hasn't been where it should've been for a while now...and so there's my declaration! :)
When you done exams? We should hang out sometime! :)
oops u're not done for awhile....I read your blog..April 29?! haha....
1998 was a turning point in my life as well... wow i dont even want to get into my life right now... hahaha... why are we soo narssisstic? (sp?) to tell you the truth in the last couple of year while i have been in edmonton i have really seen a change in you.. and i would have to say that its... ummmmm.... FANTASTIC.. although you may doubt your growth in Christ.. ireally have seen you slowly change and touch the lives of the youth one at a time... they really look up to you... and they should.. you are a good model... controlling our bitterness is something that EVERYONE struggles with... but NOt everyone is willing to admit those struggles... nor will they deal with them... i am really proud of who you have become... as a person and as a follower of Christ. know that i will always be here like you are here for me...what would i do without you sometimes?? aii... the insanity... i love you lots... right now just focus on God and on wrapping up your school year..you have the whole summer for a revival... talking about revivals...i really need one... aii i really miss my church... i will be home soon
Good post...
Let's do it. Let's go all out in YAC.
God wants to do something...He's starting to work...
Man if there's ever been a post that has almost brought a tear to the ol' eye, it's that one Crys...thanks...come home quicky....:)
Yeah, although things haven't gone according to plan, I can see God has been with me every step of the way. There's a Kutless song I listen to right now and it talks about that haha.....
Still, there's a balance...I try not to be too negative, but I want to acknowledge that things could be better...it's clicking in...you know, this idea that "oh if want our youth to be souled out, we have to be too!!" :)
Post a Comment